Hindsight

When I read, The No-Complaining Rule, by Jon Gordon I was struck by his usage of a Gallup Poll(pg.117.)  He cited a British study of 400 people which showed that when something bad happened to them they attempted to use it for a springboard into something good.  To turn misfortune into fortune!

They identified 5 deeply held beliefs that aided them:

#1.  Trust in a bigger plan.  Believe there is a God who is at work in your life with a phenomenal purpose that you may not be totally able to grasp.

#2.  Find strength in adversity.  Be like General Patton during World War II, “I was born for this time!”

#3.  Failure today leads to success tomorrow.  Like Woody Allen said, “Eighty percent of success is just showing up!” 

#4.  The worst event in life is often a catalyst for the best.  Crisis is often the very thing that motivates people to seek God.

#5.  Positive or Negative- the choice is ours.  

I like Chuck Swindoll’s quote about attitude:

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, the education, the money, than circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company... a church... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our Attitudes.”

If we’re going to grow to maturity in Christ we’ve got to be solution focused and attitude adjusted!

Hindsight

This past Sunday we took a look at the church.  Jesus Christ founded it, the Apostles guided it, Paul expanded it and we inherited it!  When we analyze the New Testament we find numerous statements concerning what human relationships in the Church are supposed to embody.  Paul lists five attitudes that are essential for a church health in Ephesians 4:2-3: humility, gentleness, patience, love and peace.  I wish I could say that all churches everywhere have always reflected these values. 

Consider the scope of getting everyone on the same page.  Of the 6.9 billion people worldwide 2.2 billion people say they belong to the church.  That’s one third of all the people who exist on this planet today!  There are Christians in churches in every one of the 223 countries of the world. Christianity is the major religion of the world.  (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Prevailing_world_religions_map.png) 

According to the Pew Forum the church of Jesus has quadrupled in the last one hundred years, but the percentage of Christians has stayed at about one third of the worldwide population.  
Yet there has been an amazing shift. 

In 1900 two thirds of all Christians lived in Europe, now only about a quarter of all Christians live in Europe.  Because of missionaries sub-Sahara Africa now makes up about a quarter of all Christians.  Of all current Christians one third are in the Americas and one eighth are found in Asia.  Asian Christians are also a result of sacrificial missionaries who went there 150 years ago.

If we look back in history we’ll see that these numbers represent healthy progress for the church.  It’s estimated that in 500 AD twenty two percent of the world was Christian. It’s also been estimated that by 1500 AD there had been a decrease in the worldwide church to nineteen percent.  However, today it’s above thirty percent!  God is at work in His world.

Yet our world is still broken.  When we hear of tragedies like the shootings in Aurora Colorado.  It proves to us that Satan is alive and well on planet Earth.  Jesus said that Satan has come to, “…steal and kill and destroy…” (John 10:10) and that certainly was the horrific result in Colorado.  But Jesus continues and says, “…I have come that they may have life and it to the full!” 

So when Paul writes to the Ephesians urging them to aggressively, “…live a life worthy of the calling you have received” he is praying that we will be militant representatives of the church with these five attitudes: humility, gentleness, patience, love and peace. The only hope for the world is the church of Jesus Christ.  The only hope for your world is you! 

(All the above numbers were taken from The Pew Forum, in consultation with demographers at the International Institute for Applied Systems Analysis in Laxenburg Austria, acquired and analyzed about 2,400 data sources, including censuses and general population surveys to arrive at Christian populations.  Http://pewforum.org/Christian/Global-Christianity-exec.aspx?print=true)

Hindsight

Choosing what to leave out of a sermon is painful therefore these past two weeks have been excruciating! 

Paul says in Ephesians 2:22, “…you…are…a dwelling in which God lives by his Spirit.”  In 3:1 he then says, “For this reason…”  He repeats that phrase in 3:14, “For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name.”

We need to understand Paul’s thought process.  He is stating that God is the Father of your spiritual family.  This connection to God as Father is a big issue for some, especially those who experienced growing up in a divorced family.

Judith Wallerstein is very widely considered the world’s foremost authority on the effects of divorce on children.  She wrote a book which I read cover to cover in 2000 entitled, The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce; A 25 year Landmark Study.  It involved long term interviews with 131 children over a 25 year period of time.

One of the major psychological battles that children of divorce face is a sense of being fatherless.  One interview Wallerstein conducted was with Larry who broke through the depression and passivity that a lot of children from divorce face.  His statement is very revealing, “I decided that I had to be my own father and take control of my own life, that I couldn’t rely on anyone, that I was the only one who was responsible for me.”

Isn’t it interesting that all through scripture God presents Himself as a father?! Especially, for the fatherless.  I'm not saying there aren't some great dads out there who stay connected with their kids after a painful divorce.  But statistics say that 33% of children lose ALL contact with their fathers after a divorce!  Even a greater percentage know where there father is but lose all contact because of the stress the parents divorce caused.

Freud said that we invent God because we need a permanent father who is not susceptible to death or tempted with divorcing from his family.  Basically, saying that we simply project a God so that we have a father.

Dr. Paul Vitz in his book, Faith of the Fatherless, follows the history of many philosophers who become decided atheists: Neitzche, Voltaire, Hume, Russell, Camus.  Vitz reports from his study that he believes all these great thinkers gave up on God as father because they were raised in families where their fathers had either died, left, or were highly abusive.

Wallerstein lays out some very useful rules for successful relationship for those who are children of divorce; I find them useful for everyone!  She writes,

“…never go to bed angry with each other…all grievances must be aired with 24 hours or they’re history. Never fight in front of the children. Never bring up past grievances; solve them now…Sulk if you must. Throw things if you have to. But don’t leave the scene. Problems in a marriage are meant to be solved, not ducked or avoided. Running away is unacceptable.  Rules are useful in every marriage, but they are essential in a marriage involving a child of divorce because rules make it safe to be angry and disagree. Making it safe for anger also strangely enough makes it safe to be honest and safe to love.”

In the Bible, Moses tells Joshua that he can be strong and courageous in leading God’s people because, “He will never leave you nor forsake you” Deuteronomy 31:6. 

The writer of Hebrews picks up on this and repeats it in 13:5 to command Christians to distrust in temporary materialism but to trust in their permanent Father, God. 

Jesus reiterates this in Matthew 28:20 when he says, “…I am with you ALWAYS…”  He also says in John 6:37&39-40  “All whom the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away…And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and  believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day.”

God is a permanent indwelling heavenly Father who is fully capable of making promises that He is fully committed to keep.

Hindsight

The thing I love about the Bible is that it’s reality based.  If you wanted to start a movement you’d want to write stories about heroes who succeed wildly, who gain wealth incredibly, who stay healthy supernaturally.  I’d want to have people picturing God as though he were Santa Claus.  Instead, in the pages of scripture, we have people who often struggle, lose and suffer!  Following God does not guarantee health and wealth, reality is usually not like that.  Before you commit to following the God of the Bible count the cost carefully.  Look with me for a few moments at the how the Bible records the lives of individuals who are highly committed.

Jeremiah preaches for forty years and no one listens and nothing changes!  That’s got to be discouraging.  Yet Jeremiah faithfully followed God’s claim on his life and performed the task for which God had created him.  Now the word of the Lord came to me saying, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, And before you were born I consecrated you; I have appointed you a prophet to the nations.” Jeremiah 1:4-5  If I were God trying to obtain recruits I surely wouldn’t tell that story!

How about Isaiah who is told, “Go, and tell this people: Keep on listening, but not perceive; Keep on looking, but do not understand. Render the hearts of this people insensitive, Their ears dull, And their eye dim, Lest they see with their eyes, Hear with their ears, Understand with their hearts, And return and be healed.”  Isaiah 6:9-10  Why would you tell that story if you were trying to explain the benefits of following God?

Why would God allow these stories into the pages of scripture? 

#1.  Because He wants us to understand that the world is an evil place, and when you serve a holy God who asks for holy attitudes and holy lives, evil people want to make you look like a loser. 

#2.  Because He wants us to realize that there are larger issues in life than our personal comfort.  What if every decision revolved around my own personal comfort?  I’d never get out of bed in the morning.  Being truthful, honest, and straight-forward may be a pea under the mattress of my personal comfort!

#3.  Because He wants us to comprehend that there are lessons that can only be learned through suffering.  I am inspired by people who, although suffering, are faithful to their Lord.  

Hindsight

Every Sunday I’m frustrated because I can’t illustrate and apply the scripture we study in multiple ways.  I have to settle for one illustration or one application.  I really wanted to contrast and compare the relationship formula that Paul uses to reconcile Gentiles and Jews together.  Let’s discuss that relationship formula for a few moments.

Paul says that to build relational unity and destroy barriers between people you’ve got to:

#1.  Spend time together.

Paul says to, “Bring near,” Verse 13, and that is in contrast to keeping someone, “far off.”

Isn’t that obvious?  If you’re having disunity one of the solutions is to spend more time together.  Find what you have in common and emphasize your common ground.

#2.  Eliminate differences.

One non-negotiable is the need to, “Destroy the barrier,”  Verse 14, and that is in contrast to maintaining the barrier.  This is not rocket science is it?  Isn’t anger a barrier?  How about bitterness, envy, jealousy, hurt feelings, angry words, insensitive actions? Emphasize common ground and disregard differences and destroy as many relational barriers as possible.

#3.  Create an accommodating environment.

Paul says to, “Abolish the law,” Verse 15, instead of maintaining legalism.  The Jews had to set aside their dietary, cultural, worship laws to accommodate the Gentiles.  The Gentiles had to be sensitive to the Jewish need to honor their heritage.  Both groups had to negotiate, allow for some give and take, honor one another’s past while forging a new future. 

Let’s make this really simple, are we willing to do that in the smallest microcosm…our in-laws! 

#4.  Deeply desire friendship.

Paul uses the word reconcile, Verse 16, which literally means, “to bring someone from a state of loathsome hatred to the place of intimate friendship.”  As we think of people with whom we’ve had broken relationships are we willing to set friendship as the goal of future interaction with them?

#5.  Be available.

The commitment God has to give us, “access,” Verse 18, to Himself rather than being too busy running the Universe to deal with our petty issues.  When someone asks us for help or time are we willing to give it?

The 5 step relationship formula that Paul uses here in Ephesians 3 can revolutionize our own ability to create highly connective long-term relationships.